Everyone knows that internet arguments are an insult to human intelligence. If you cannot avoid them, at least follow these tips.
1. Think about what you're saying. This is not a luxury you are afforded IRL.
2. You must keep impeccable grammar and spelling. This is the internet equivalent of remaining perfectly calm as your opponent foams at the mouth (poor writing style).
3. Internet arguments are mainly for the benefit of observers. Be sure to write concisely and clearly. Use of five-dollar words can be effective, but keep it natural and don't overdo it. People are going to pay more attention to someone who writes two clear sentences than someone who writes a run-on paragraph using little punctuation and no upper-case letters.
4. A picture is worth a thousand words. A chanboard macro is worth over nine thousand.
5. Never resort to ad hominem without proof. If your opponent tries it, be ready with "NO U".
6. You cannot harm each other physically over the internets. Emotional manipulation, however, is your primary weapon. If your opponent kills himself, you have won.
7. If your adversary is being serious, make it a joke. If he rages, chill. Always keep contrast.
8. If the argument is about religion, don't even start.
9. If you're arguing with a group of people, it is much more effective to respond to everyone in one statement. Writing everyone an individual response is cumbersome.
10. If you find yourself losing, try rickrolling them. If you're really ambitious, use the 50 Hitler Post.
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